Dear Aunt Tea:

I have been drinking whole leaf tea for almost ten years.  The forty years prior to that, I was strictly a tea bag man, buying Lipton and Red Rose bags by the gross.  I love my whole leaf!  It is sooooo much better than the bags!  I haven’t had a cup of dusty bagged brew in ages, honest.  What I want to know, Auntie, is why I am drinking nasty old stapled bags in my dreams? 

– Sleepless in Saint Louis

Dear Sleepless:

Those were nightmares.  “Drinking bags” is especially troublesome!    It is quite clear that Traban, the sneaky little Tetley elf, is troubling your tea ritual.  You need to go through your tea cabinet and throw away all the old tea bags in your possession. Except one. Take that last one, wet it thoroughly, and bury it at the base of the nearest351852379_a4bc00e2ab camellia bush on the first night of the full moon. Then, go home and brew a cup of your very best black tea and leave it on the counter top with a note:  “Drink this tea and flee from me.”  If the tea is gone in the morning, it worked!  Sweet dreams!

Dear Aunt Tea:

I am a nine- year old girl who loves tea!  Mummy makes green and white tea for me!  We use the pretty cups and saucers, but Daddy says I cannot have a Tea Party, “Those guys are absolute nutcases!”  I don’t understand why he is so upset.  I want to have a tea party for my 10th birthday party!  Besides, no “guys” (boys, ewwwww!) will be invited.  My birthday is coming up soon, Auntie!  What can I do to convince Daddy that my tea party isn’t that Tea Party?

-Alice in Albuquerque

Dear Alice,

19482887_3f07968e5cFirst of all, I can’t tell you how pleased I am that you are drinking green and white tea!  Those teas are my favorites, too!  And, they look so elegant in a pretty cup and saucer.  About your Dad . . . like many well-meaning parents, he is associating politics with tea, which is not a good combination!  UNLESS there is a spirit of compromise (that big word means that both sides have to give up something they really want to keep), then tea is perfect!  Make a pot of your favorite tea and take a cup to your Daddy. Pour a cup for yourself.   Have him read this link about the Tea Party, and then have him watch this link about your tea party.  He will understand, I am sure.  Have a wonderful birthday tea party!

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Editor’s note:  If you have a tea problem in need of Aunt Tea’s advice, please send it to [email protected] and put “Aunt Tea” in the subject line.  Previous gems of advice can be found here and here.