Thursday February 25, 2010 | 6 comments
In the past month, I’ve had two major events happen in my life – I was laid off from a job I’d had for only four months and my mom came to stay with me as she continues to recover from a broken hip. I love my mom very much, but we haven’t lived together in close to 20 years. And between trying to adjust to my unexpected free time, and trying to strike a balance between caring for my mom and letting her do some things for herself, I’ve become a total ball of stress.
Usually in these situations, I would turn to tea to calm me down and give myself a break from the world. And usually, it works. This time, however, I’ve continued to turn to tea, but I haven’t yet found the right one to help me fully relax and think of ways to cope with my stress. I find myself gulping down the tea while it is still too hot and burning my mouth, or forgetting about it and letting it get cold, then trying to reheat it (which is never good).
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‘ve even found myself absent-mindedly spilling tea on my desk and lap as I try to take a sip. Clearly my mind is occupied with way too many thoughts. I usually find that oolongs help me focus and soothe my mind when it’s roiling away like a pot at full boil, but now they don’t seem to be having any effect. I also turn to Darjeeling teas to induce a more contemplative state – maybe trying to imagine myself at a lovely and relaxing English tea.
At the moment, though, I feel like I need something more potent. I’m just not sure what tea that would be. Many of the traditional tisanes – St. John’s Wort in particular – seem to have the opposite effect on me – first I get keyed up, then I crash. My sister has recommended a floral remedy (she uses Bach Flower Remedies), but I’m not too sure about them, either.
In any case, I think the key is that I need to practice a more mindful, meditative way of preparing my tea to heighten the sense of taking a break. Instead of putting on the pot of water to boil, then rushing off to do something else, I should take a few minutes to breathe and meditate. And instead of sitting at my computer, typing and clicking away while I drink my tea, I need to find a soothing, relaxing spot to take a moment to myself.
I know that tea can help me get through these stressful events; I just need to give it the proper time and attention to do its job.
Couldn’t agree more… it is all about the ceremony surrounding your tea break :)
I think you’ve figured it out. Make the tea and take the time…………….which might be challenging with your mom under foot so to speak. Perhaps there’s a wonderful tea shop in walking distance from you and you might take a book or journal with you, each day, to have some quite time to yourself.
Hi, I recently started reading your blog and love it. So sorry to hear things are happening all at once and stressing you out. Rooibos can help set the tone to set the time aside and stop in the moment. I usually go for chamomile when the world’s spinning way too fast around me and I don’t want to get caught up too much.
Exactly Nancy. It’s not the tea, per se, that’s calming (although the l-theanine certainly does help), it’s the ritual of tea preparation and consumption that’s centering. Now that you’ve figured it out, just keep being mindfully aware of it and keep doing it. Good luck.
Thanks, everyone, for the kind words and support. I’m finding that taking that few minutes as a mental “time out” really does help enhance the soothing properties of tea!
Hi Nancy,
So sorry to hear about your job loss. It is never easy losing a job, especially with the economy the way it is today, then on top of that, after being on your own for over 20 years and now having your mom to take care of, even though you love her, adds to an already stressful situation.
Our Healthy Living tea call Anxiety Assistance. It is more on the medicinal side with all organic Astragalus, Skullcap, St. John’s Wort, Spearmint, Valerian Root, Chamomile and Lemon Balm. You have to acquire a taste for it, due to the medicinal qualities, but we have customers that have been drinking it on a regular basis for over two and a half years, for everything from job stress, pressures of college, and just crazy financial issues going on in their lives. If that doesn’t appeal to you, something like Hibiscus & Honeybush has just the right blend of floral and honey to relax your mind and help your mood. Take care and make sure you find time for yourself with a good cup of tea.